• Home
• Watch Tributes
• Add Video
• Add Music
• Books & Speakers
• Dear Maddy
• Tribute Film Festival

Latest Posts

• Dear Maddy

  
  

  Sep 19

  Jazzy Wife

  Funeral Planning, Etiquette  

  Dear Maddy,

  My 87 year old husband loves jazz. He is a member of the local Jazz Society and often shows up at events with a suitcase of music. He does this so often that many hosts simply wait for his arrival rather than hire a local band or DJ. My husband is now in hospice with little time left on this earth, and I find myself preparing for his funeral. I want to play his favorite songs on loudspeakers at the service, including Duke Ellington as his casket is rolled down the aisle, but I'm afraid our local funeral director who believes that anything but church music is undignified will object or that I may offend people. What shall I do? And what else can I do to honor him?

  Signed, Jazzy Wife

   

  Dear Jazzy Wife,

  By all means celebrate the life of your beloved husband. I can't imagine any funeral director objecting to your wishes. Remember, funeral directors, on the whole, are some of the most compassionate people you will ever meet. Their job is to help you with the final arrangements. And, as with anything in life, don't let others dictate your wishes. I'm sure they will go out of their way to accommodate you. Arrange a time to meet, perhaps at the hospice, and clearly explain your wishes. As for other ways to honor your husband, you could hire a videographer to videotape him talking about his passion for jazz and sharing some parting words which you could play at the funeral as well. Perhaps you could pass out his favorite CDs with his name on them as remembrance gifts. You may want to also have a trumpet or saxophone player present to perform his favorite tunes. Or you could have the local Jazz Society play some tunes. Any or all of these options should create a wonderful and memorable service in honor of your husband. If your husband is well enough, you might consider having a "living funeral" so he can fully appreciate the moment.

   

  To Life, Maddy Banks

  
  

  Comments (0)

  
  

  Write comment

  Name

  Comment smaller | bigger
  

  
  Write the displayed characters

  Add Comment

  
  

Footer

• 
  
  
  Copyright 2007 The Tribute Network      Terms and Conditions | Privacy Policy | About | Advertise on TTN | Contact Us