Letter to the Dying

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

My step-grandmother is dying of cancer. She is receiving hospice care in her home and we have been told her time left is short. I have known her since I was 9 (I'm 37 now) and even though we were not very close she has been a positive influence in my life. I want to send her a letter telling her all the things I love about her and to thank her for being the beautiful person she is. She is aware of her condition and has [...]

Contemplating Pre-Need

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

My wife and I are thinking about buying pre-need funerals and burial plots because of the savings involved. The problem is we don't know if we'll stay in our hometown. Our children have all moved to other parts of the country. And we might decide to retire to a warmer climate. What should we do?

Signed, Contemplating Pre-Need

The Depression Zone

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

QUESTION: What happens when grief becomes unbearable and overwhelming? How do you survive loss when loss itself becomes your own demise?

Signed, The Depression Zone

Dear Depression Zone,

ANSWER: Sometimes we forget what gives us joy. It takes faith to remember that depression is like the oce [...]

Frozen at Death's Door

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

QUESTION: My father is dying. Neither he nor I know what to say. Imminent grief hangs like a sharp barrier reef between us. How do I tear it down? What on earth do I do?

Signed, Frozen at Death's Door

Dear Frozen at Death's Door,

ANSWER: Fear of the unknown creates the barrier between you and your [...]

Front Row Only

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy:

My husband and I paid a lot of money for a burial plot to be next to Al Jolson. Thirty years later, and we're getting a divorce. So... who gets the plot?

Signed, Front Row Only

Dear Front Row Only,

This is something you to discuss with your divorce attorney. [...]

Bird Blues

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

My seven year old daughter's yellow parakeet named Pocket died. My daughter is distraught. What can I do to help heal her grief?

Signed, Bird Blues

Dear Bird Blues,

Create an end of life celebration ritual for Pocket. Discuss the details of the ceremony and burial [...]

Deadly & Delicious

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

If I make a set of ceramic dishes out of my loved one, is it inappropriate to have a date over for dinner and use the dishes?

Signed, Deadly & Delicious

Dear Deadly & Delicious,

Ethically and morally, you would be compelled to tell your date that yo [...]

Up in the Air

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

I'm a funeral director in FL. I recently took care of a family where siblings complained about a sister who insisted on reading a eulogy she'd written for their father. None of the siblings knew about it until moments before the service. The siblings were concerned about time and how their sister would depict their father and family members.

The daughter spoke for thirty minutes leaving no time for other siblin [...]

Jazzy Wife

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

My 87 year old husband loves jazz. He is a member of the local Jazz Society and often shows up at events with a suitcase of music. He does this so often that many hosts simply wait for his arrival rather than hire a local band or DJ. My husband is now in hospice with little time left on this earth, and I find myself preparing for his funeral. I want to play his favorite songs on loudspeakers at the service, i [...]

Seating for Equality

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy:

I want to arrange the seating at my father's funeral so everyone feels comfortable. My relatives are very sensitive as to their placement. How do I make everyone feel equally important?

Signed, Seating for Equality

Dear Seating for Equality,

Create "seating in the [...]

Ashes that Glitter

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy:

A friend admired a necklace I always wear; the kind of friend who is spooked by the mere mention of ghosts. She asked me to get her the same necklace for her birthday. I was too embarrassed and afraid I might induce her to faint if I told her my necklace is the carbonized remains of my dead husband. Should I get her a necklace anyway with some of the leftover cremated remains of my husband? Of course, I might [...]

Between Here and There

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy,

I travel the world; call me a wander lust baby boomer with no religious affiliation. When asked where I live, I reply Terminal 3 at Chicago's O'Hare Airport. My close friends and relatives are scattered around the globe. I want to plan ahead for my end of life celebration, but so far, I can't even figure out the "where" of it. Can you help?

Signed, Between Here & There

Atheist with Achilles Heel

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy:

In the recent decade, I have become a lapsed Catholic and opted for atheism. I now have no religion but would like to purchase a pre-need funeral for myself so as not to burden my family. I'd like a funeral service but without clergy. Is there a non-denominational person I can plan ahead with who can preside? How would I find this person? And what happens if they expire before I do?

Resurrected

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy:

My best friend from college and I both lost our spouses around the same time. A year has passed and I have started to date while she still dresses in black and rarely socializes. I encourage her to go out, but she says she's not ready and implies that I'm being unfaithful. I feel terrible guilt, yet I want to meet someone and fall in love again. We have a long history of friendship and I don't want to lose he [...]

Prevention Method Ceremony

ckgreen1@yahoo.com — Fri, 15 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0100

Dear Maddy:

My daughter, an outspoken birth control advocate, was killed in a car accident. My relatives are very provincial mid-westerners. My daughter's best friend, a renowned abstract artist, wants to drape the casket with a giant wreath made out of condoms and diaphragms. Should I allow this? And how would I explain this to my relatives? Signed, Prevention Method Ceremony

&n [...]

Blog Entries

Letter to the Dying

Contemplating Pre-Need

The Depression Zone

Frozen at Death's Door

Front Row Only

Bird Blues

Deadly & Delicious

Up in the Air

Jazzy Wife

Seating for Equality

Ashes that Glitter

Between Here and There

Atheist with Achilles Heel

Resurrected

Prevention Method Ceremony